As Mercury is Retrograde and the trickster god likes his pranks, here are some really daft limericks, of the kind you can easily learn off by heart to entertain your friends!

It is an unfortunate habit
Of the rabbit to breed like a rabbit
One can say without question
This leads to congestion
In the burrows that rabbits inhabit

There was an old man from Blackheath
Who sat on his set of false teeth
Said he, with a start,
Lord Bless My Heart
I have bitten myself underneath.

There was an old lady of Rye
Who was baked by mistake in a pie.
To the baker’s disgust
She emerged from the crust
And said with a yawn, ‘Where am I?’

There was a young fellow of Leeds
Who swallowed a packet of seeds.
In a month, silly ass,
He was covered in grass,
And couldn’t sit down for the weeds.

There was a young lady of Ealing
Who couldn’t get rid of the feeling
That she was a fly
And that she should try
To walk upside down on the ceiling.

There’s a famous family called Stein
There’s Gert, there’s Ep, there’s Ein.
Gert’s prose is all bunk
Ep’s sculpture’s are junk
And no-one can understand Ein…